THE OXYCISE! SONG
This moment of silliness was brought to you by Lesleigh Hershkowitz
(sung to the tune of "Hooray for Hollywood")

Hooooray for Oxycise!
It firms my tummy and it shapes my thighs,
I find these movements so inspiring,
I like perspiring,
and breathing deeply.

Hooray for Oxycise!,
Just take a deep breath and you'll be surprised!
Why are you sitting there and hesitating,
Forget the waiting,
and order OXYCISE!

Janice's Song's
by Janice M.

Song #1 
(Sung to the tune of "Yesterday")

Oxycise!
Really truly can't believe my eyes
Now I'm dressing in a smaller size
O, I believe in Oxycise!
Suddenly, my old clothes are hanging off of me
I'm now half the gal I used to be
I owe it all to Oxycise!

In and out I breathe day by day with huffs and puffs
Pull my tummy in, now I live for Oxyciiiiiiiiiise

Oxycise!
Now I'm not ashamed of my two thighs
and my husband looks at me and sighs
Now he believes in Oxycise!
O, he believes in Oxycise!!!

Song #2
(Sung to the tune of "I'm a Believer")

I tried every diet known to modern man; 
Seems the less I ate, the more I gained.
Fat was out to get me (do da do da)
That's the way it seemed (do da do da)
And I even gained weight while I dreamed.

Chorus: And then I started to breathe! 
Now I'm a believer! 
Not a trace of fat on my thighs! 
I love O! Ooooo oh, I'm a believer and I'll be a breather 'til I die..

I thought Oxycise! was just a fairy tale,
Seemed to be much too good to be true,
What's the use in trying? (do da do da)
Just a waste of cash! (do da do da)
May as well go to the cupboard for my stash!

(Chorus) 

  Poem
by Mark E. Calloway (click here to see Mark's "After" photo)

I don't have "Before" pictures, and feel like a jerk,
Because I didn't think your Oxycise! program would work,
But I've had continued success using Oxycise!
Now my friends and co-workers can't believe their eyes,
They seem to think I've been sneaky and quiet,
While secretly using some new easy diet,
They say I'm lying, because we all breathe everyday,
And how can you simply just breathe extra pounds away,
But it's really quite simple if you just realize,
That you only have to stop what you're doing, and just Oxycise!

  Two Poems by Lauren Ortiz

Lauren is a talented poet and writes, "I've been Oxycising since January 25 [2001]. I'm 47 years old, married, with an eight-year-old son. I used to write lots of poetry in my teens and twenties, and then I stopped for a long time. I recently started writing poetry again. ' A Healing Place' was my first effort in over 20 years."  

A Healing Place

A place to pray, to contemplate,
To go inside, and then create.
A time and place to search my soul;
To dream a dream, then set a goal.
To put a plan in motion; then,
To search and dream and plan again.

I need the time and space to find
The many selves that fill my mind;
Forgotten voices from the past
Whose echoes linger 'til the last.
To sift them through and find their worth,
And thus, perhaps, my own rebirth

To trace the tangled knots that tie
The present to the past and lie
Beneath the chaos in my heart.
They trip me up with each new start
And keep me tethered to the spot.
I must unravel every knot.

And when the threads are straight and free,
I'll weave anew a truer me.
I'll find the measure of my soul
And form a pattern clear and whole;
A tapestry of warmth and strength.
As yet, I cannot guess its length.

A break, but not for coffee

Gazing into the heart of a perfect camellia,
I am transported
Far from the ringing of phones,
The click of computer keys,
And the din of office chatter.

My world is filled
With the symmetry of petals,
A pink as soft as a blushing pearl,
Gently overlapping,
Like ripples from raindrops,
Or shimmering scaled armor
To guard my peace for one more moment.

A-a-a-h! Deep, cleansing breaths.
I breath in serenity, breath out stress.
In and out.
Again.
Once more.

Better.

Refreshed and restored,
I pick up the phone.