Judi’s Oxycise! Story – Dr. Seuss Style

My Oxycise! Story

Late one night
I could not close my eyes.
Watching infomercials,
I saw Oxycise!

Doubt it I did,
skeptic I am.
I picked up the phone,
but put it down with a slam.

Just another gimmick
I thought to myself,
the tapes will just sit
way high up on the shelf.

I went out with my sisters
first time in awhile.
Someone wanted a picture;
We all had a smile.

The pictures came back;
I was anxious to see
the picture of Mary Jane,
Susan and me.

I looked at it once
then looked again.
I thought to myself…
“I gained a TON,
But just WHEN!?”

Nobody told me,
I guess to be kind.
That Oxycise! number
I REALLY must find!

I searched thru my papers
and found it at last.
I picked up the phone
and dialed real fast.

“I need these tapes,”
I started to holler.
I would have paid my
LAST bottom dollar.

Gracious they were,
understanding my plight
I wished I had had it
shipped overnight.

I came home from work
and searched thru the mail
There was my kit
(it was also on sale).

I put the tape
into the VCR
and took the commuter tape
out to my car.

I started to breathe
and sniff and puff
but as I practiced
it wasn’t so tough.

The tape measure and scale
I used at the start,
but the numbers were scary
nearly stopping my heart!

I had more energy
and felt pretty good
I just used some sense
when it came to my food…

I also drank water
and gave up my Pepsi
a small price to pay
to start lookin’ sexy!

10 weeks and counting
no gimmicks, no tricks,
I went from a 12
all the way to a 6!

I am ever so grateful
to Jill and the Bunch
If I’m ever in Colorado,
I’ll take you to lunch!!!

Thanks a MILLION!
Judi